Snippets from Gaza. 27.01.2009
But I didn't imagine for a second it would be like this. At around 11 or
11:30 am, I felt like an earthquake hit Khan Younis with sounds I'd never,
ever heard before -- not even when the Israeli occupation forces used sonic
booms a few years ago.
First thing that came to my heart was my mother, sisters and the kids at
school and kindergarten. I was upstairs rushing to take a hot shower --
I'd been taking cold showers for over a week because it was not sunny enough
to heat the water and we didn't have electricity in decent hours or decent
power to heat enough water for my luxurious 5 minute shower!
I rushed down the steps, faster than the sounds I was hearing. Looked into
my sister's eyes, looked into my mother's eyes and, in no time, I ran towards
the steps into the garden to go get the kids from kindergarten and school…
My nephew who is six- years-old had exams, so he was back early from school.
The other two were at the door. It happened that our neighbor was in town,
so he had brought them along with his own child.
The kids were scared and talking about the huge sound which they didn't
understand. Wael, my 4-year-old nephew didn't understand a thing -- he didn't
even know that Israel exists.
Now he knows. All of them do.
The whole family didn't know what to do, so we all gathered in the garden.
Last time the Israelis attacked, our windows crashed in over our heads and
some doors were broken. This time the shelling is stronger, so the best
solution seems to be, to stay out in the open.
All of that and the noise of the bombing continues, there's smoke around
us everywhere and the smell of shelling is back to pollute our life one
more time.
I was trying for over an hour to call my brother and his family in Gaza
city to know that he was safe. Landline and mobile lines were out of service!
After an hour we managed to get hold of one of them -- my nephew Azzam,
who is working for the UN. He tells me that he's safe at one of the shelters
in the UN compound in Gaza. It's the first time I hear that shelters even
exist in Gaza!
After two hours, text messages started being delivered and we got responses
from everyone that they are safe BUT … everyone his/her own story
of this manmade earthquake to tell.
Later, we discovered that the bombing happened at the same time in all of
Gaza Strip. How lucky my family and I are because we are not among the scores
of people killed in the first 5 minutes of the attack! We are
lucky, we really are!!!
For the passed 20 days we haven't had cooking gas. Last month my cousin
gave us his extra 6 kg to use. This morning, on Black Saturday, the 27th
of December, 2008, we managed to get some cooking gas from the black market
which I have been trying to avoid all my life. I filled my cousin's and
our cylinders, paid four times the price, but I had no choice.
At 5 pm I felt it was safe to take the cooking gas cylinder to my cousin's
house because the shelling had stopped. The house is only 5 minutes away
from us by car. The kids insisted to come and they started to cry, so I
took them with me. We drove in a loop around the house and entered the street
from behind. But then I remembered that there was a police station there,
so I thought it's better to take the other road. I reversed and took the
other street to find in front of us an airplane shelling a car.
The kids see the flames and hear the sound. They're so scared. I tell them
this is fireworks for the New Year.
We couldn't go back to the house because our neighbor's funeral was passing
and the street was full of people and cars, so I decided to just go ahead.
We gave the cylinder to my cousin and on our way back there was another
huge explosion, this one at one of the police posts in the city.
We leave the fireworks behind and come home.
My mother tells us that the Israelis have just shelled Asda'a Media City,
the new entertainment area at the ex-Israeli settlements, at the edge of
Khan Younis. Arslan, my 5-year-old nephew, is furious. Arslan, like all
other kids, likes this place because it has fish, a small zoo, a small playground
and a restaurant. He cries and cries. I cannot promise him anything: "I'm
sure we'll find another place that is more beautiful… "
We made sure to have the kids fall asleep among us first and then took them
upstairs to their beds so they would somehow feel secure.
All night I couldn't sleep, hearing the shelling, calling friends and family
to make sure they were ok, listening to the radio because there was no electricity
to watch TV, and cursing myself for being so stupid as to take the kids
out of the house!!! I don't know if I am insensitive, or the Israelis, or
the world!!!! Isn't it wise to take kids out?... Of course, it is... But
not in Gaza. Not at this time. Nor at other times...
28 December, 2008
In the morning, Wael wakes up and comes to me to show me his finger which
is swollen: "Look, this is from the shelling and air strike!"
"When?" I ask.
"Last night when I was sleeping, they hit me."
"You lie," I say.
He smiles and says: "You lie too..."!!!
31 December, 2008
Yesterday night I called my friend Wafa, who is living in Gaza City, in
Tel Al-Hawa neighborhood, to check on her. She is fine and they are a
lucky family, as she said. Because on Saturday when the first bombing of
Gaza Strip started, she had all her doors and windows open since she was
about to clean and rearrange her apartment.
None of her windows or doors are broken, unlike all her neighbors, who are
now seeking her apartment's refuge on the second floor.
Wafa told me that after 7 pm all the neighbors gather in her small apartment,
men in one room and women in the other room. I could hear the crying of
children and anxious noises coming through the phone line.
"Mira my daughter is the one who is scared," Wafa told me. "You
remember her, right?"
"I thought if I take her out to see the reality of Gaza she might be
less scared because we're all living same situation and I'm sure we're better
off than others. So I took her for a walk around the neighborhood. I wish
I hadn't!"
"When I saw what I saw, I got scared myself," Wafa explained.
"I wanted to blindfold her eyes and run back home. I cursed myself
for taking her out of the apartment. But I'd never imagined Gaza could become
a ghost city in less than a day! If you see our neighborhood you will not
recognize it."
Wafa added hysterically: "You know, Majeda, we are all fine. Really.
Our only problem is that we don't get any electricity since the bombings
on the first day. Since then I make the bread dough and send it to my neighbor
in the building nearby to have it baked. They have a power generator, thank
god!"
"To be honest, the bread, the cold, buildings and all of that are not
the problem for us today," Wafa told me. "Our real problem is
that we have this rocket which did not explode in front of the building."
"What rocket?"
"The F16 rocket. We called several people but no one can do anything
about it, they are worried it will explode or the F16 will hit them if they
go near it."
"You mean it's still in front of the building?!"
'No, not right in front now. The Civil Defense came and tied a rope around
it and moved it up toward the road."
"They put some sand over it so no kids or others would get hurt."
4 January, 2009
Yesterday was most awful day we ever lived, I think. My mother said even
the 1967 War was not this bad. No electricity, very little water, freezing
cold and most horrific was the cold accompanied by the live war orchestra.
Tanks bombing from the ground incursion, F16s bombing, the drone which keeps
going around in circles all day and night non-stop, making this annoying
sound as if there is a bee just at the edge of your ear. And added to all
of this, the sound of shelling from the sea.
War melody, is what I want to call it.
Like this I can answer Wael's questions. He keeps asking: What is war? Why
is war? Who started war? Why is war?
Maybe if I add the word melody, he'll ask about what a melody is...
Unfortunately, Wael doesn't ask about melody. Instead, he keeps asking:
Why does the pilot want to kill the birds? Why does the pilot hate birds?
Maybe he doesn't know that they have a life like us...
I 'm shocked by his question: "Maybe he doesn't know that birds have
a life."
I ask Wael to come inside because it's freezing cold outside. His birds
are no longer in the sky. "Come let's play the Alaska game!"
"What is Alaska?"
"It's a new game we'll all play with grandmother. Each of us has her/his
own blanket to cover all of the body from head to toe."
I don't know if we were trying to warm ourselves or trying to hide from
all the bombing... Whatever it was, it felt better since there was no electricity
and no birds in the sky comforting us.
"Ok, Wael, you are the head of the state of Alaska, and we are the
people of Alaska. What do you order us to do?" I started the game...
"I order you to go to the shop and buy me an airplane, a cage and seeds,"
he said, sucking on his thumb.
"Why?" I ask. "You need to explain to me."
"I want to fly up, up, up -- till I reach god!
I will bring all my birds,
and put them in a cage.
I'll fly again,
and I'll catch the pilot.
I will bring him here
and give him the seeds to feed the birds."
I look at Wael as the bombing continues, he's quite anxious.
...And I thought the Alaska game could bring some kind of creative ideas
to bring warmth to our bodies and some life under this bombardment.
Unfortunately, it wasn't a very smart idea. So I just obeyed my mother's
order: we all got closer to each other and created a net of hugs that really
brought warmth to our life and very little security.
We kept listening to the melody coming from outside and we started to count
the bombs out loud; 1, 2, 3, ... 28, ... 32 .... The kids don't know how
to continue counting after 50, so we stopped.
We have to keep the door and windows open because the shelling of the F16
can shatter the door and window panes. It happened before, in March 2008,
when they hit the building in front of us. But then there was glass available
in the market. This time there is nothing, which means we might spend the
whole winter with no doors and panes for the windows. Let's be in control
for a change and choose to open the windows and doors.
A very long 5 hours passes by and the situation is still the same. The only
change we witness is an extra sound added to the orchestra: the sound of
ambulances going up and down.
I ask the kids to sleep on the first floor with all of us. Wael refuses.
He keeps saying: I'll sleep in my bed, because if I don't, the pilot will
hit our apartment.
I try to convince him that if we are all together, then we'll feel warmer.
He finally agrees. But then he keeps asking to go upstairs to check on his
bed, his room, his toys, his schoolbag. In the end it seems safer to just
let him stay in one place, so his family goes upstairs, even though it's
colder and more dangerous.
After everyone went to sleep, the electricity came on. It had been almost
24 hours we'd spent without electricity. I tried to take full advantage
of it. First thing: hot shower. But unfortunately, it didn't work because
the current wasn't powerful enough to heat the water. So I sat at the computer,
finished some work that needed to be done, wrote emails to friends and family
outside Palestine to try and comfort them and assure them that we had survived
one more day under this war on Gaza.
5 January, 2008
Just before going to bed Wael says: "Actually, I like war."
I ask why.
"Because I don't have to wash my face and hands. I don't have to wash
my hands and face in this cold. And I don't have to go to kindergarten in
the morning."
"But you won't be able to count the bombs... if you don't go to kindergarten,
because you'll only be able to count until 50."
"I don't like to count bombs anyway," he answers and goes up the
steps.
I feel how stupid I am to make this little boy count bombs. I'm so angry
with myself.
Wael comes back and says: "I want to ask you: if a boy and his father
are made out of iron, will the rocket affect them?"
"Yes," I answer.
"And if they are made out of wood?"
"Yes," I answer.
"And if they are made out of tree?"
Suddenly I recognize that I must say no, so he can sleep...
to be continued ... by Majeda Al-Saqqa ahbab84@yahoo.com